


The Missing Chapters

by jebbypal



Category: Firefly
Genre: Gen, Pre-Series
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2008-01-08
Updated: 2010-01-30
Packaged: 2017-10-06 21:24:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 16,635
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/57907
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jebbypal/pseuds/jebbypal
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Everyone's curious, but Kaylee finally asks.  Exactly how did Simon rescue River?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Les342](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=Les342).



> Disclaimer: Joss, 20th Century Fox, and Universal own all and sundry of the Firefly 'verse. I only claim Meg and Omar.

It's another long day of work getting Serenity back to rights after…Kaylee shudders away from thoughts of the crash during the battle with the Reavers. The loss of so much and the threat to everything else she holds dear are still wounds that have yet to heal. She uses work to distract her from the memories and the empty spaces in conversation that will never be filled, but one can only work so many hours in a day before collapsing. The captain does his best to make sure that Kaylee is never the one to collapse. "Can't have you breaking the ship cause your eyes get a mind of their own," is his frequent refrain nowadays. Still, it's better than how Zoe avoids her when Kaylee does the electronic repair work that Wash once handled.

She does her best to find time for the distractions that she prefers to work. Like sexing Simon senseless on a nightly basis. She lies with her head in the crook of his neck, drinking in his scent while he snores quietly in her ear. He denies snoring very emphatically. River and Kaylee just exchange eye rolls and giggles when he gets particularly huffy about it.

Still, there are times when her mind races even after the simple pleasures with Simon. Sometimes folk need to talk to drown out the voices of those forever absent. (Maybe the captain will agree to a visit home. She misses her folks something fierce).

"You never talk about it," Kaylee tells Simon one night when the rest of the ship is asleep. She should be too, but she spent all afternoon doing repairs in the cockpit without the sound of Wash's jokes. Grief keeps her awake and she's tired of crying.

"About what?" Simon asks sleepily.

A part of Kaylee's mind cautions her against the topic. Just cause her own ghosts won't lie silent ain't a reason to go stirring up Simon's. 'Course, Kaylee's never been known for her discretion. Just ask her Ma. "River. How you saved her."

Simon stiffens and his hand pauses stroking her hair.

"It's just…When you came onboard you made it sound like you weren't involved except to receive that pod thing. But you knew all those words to turn her off and everything. There must be more to it." Guilt tugs at her heart. Talking about it probably will make Simon miss his folks as well. Worry and jealousy push it out: maybe he doesn't talk about it because there's someone he misses even more. The endless silence speaks louder than Simon ever could. "Never mind, it's stupid that I asked."

He stops her from rolling away and hugs her tight to his chest. "It's not stupid, not at all. I've just never had time to think about it since coming on _Serenity_. Nor much reason to – I succeeded after all." He pauses to kiss her forehead. "It's a long story though and we should both be sleeping."

"I'll tell you when I get sleepy, Mister," Kaylee replies as her hand skims over the tired parts of Simon's body.

He laughs quietly and captures her hand. "Well, I can see I'm not going to sleep one way or the other."

Simon falls silent for a bit so Kaylee prompts him before he can change his mind. "I know you got the code from the letters River sent."

"Yes, but it wasn't quite as simple as that. The code was spread throughout all the letters she sent, not just the ones she sent to me. I spent months pouring over the letters I'd received trying to break the damn thing." Kaylee's eyes widen at Simon's curse. "I even took a week's vacation so I could study them without the interruption of work. Meg wasn't happy about that."

"Meg?"

Simon startles a little at her question. "Meg – She was, well, now she's an ex-girlfriend."

Kaylee can't help but try to analyze his tone. Was Meg the reason it was so hard for him to let go of the Core? "How come I'm only hearing about this now?"

"I guess I never talked about her much," Simon admits.

"How about ever?" Kaylee corrects. "Is she pretty?" She does have the sense to not ask what she really wants to know. _Was she prettier than me?_

Simon stutters a little bit again as he answers, "Pretty, yes, a little."

A noise from the doorway makes them both jump. "Your nose is growing. Meg was as beautiful as a starry night. Skin black as the void with sparkling eyes like the stars. Short hair for practicality so she'd never take longer to prepare for surgery than the boys. Laughter like the songs her mother sang while she cleaned our house. Pride as big as her heart. She was Simon's beautiful moon like you're the sun that lights up the darkness," River says as she sits down on the floor beside the now slightly open door.

Sophisticated and practical. This Meg sounds like a perfect cross between Inara and Zoe. Next to that, Kaylee must look as rough and dirty as the rest of the Rim to Simon."I take it she and River met?" Kaylee asks.

Simon nods. "Other than you, I think Meg was the only girl I ever dated that River actually liked."

"I'm right here."

"I'm aware of that. And what have I said about knocking?" Simon asks as he tugs at the bed sheets to ensure that everything is fully covered. His neck is starting to color to match his cheeks. Kaylee's tempted to look to see if other parts are blushing as well. She giggles when River raps a belated knock on the floor.

"Brat," Simon says in his familiar big brother tone.

River just sticks her tongue out.

A thought occurs to Kaylee. "Did you ever tell River any of this?"

Simon's eyes widen. "No. At first I was just worried about keeping her calm and figuring out what happened to her. Then…" He shakes his head. "I guess everyone gets a bedtime story tonight."

"So Meg was upset you took time off work to study River's letters," Kaylee prompts to get Simon back on track.

Simon nods. "I was oblivious to it. Whenever I brought it up, she kept reminding me of every prank and game that River ever played, but-"

"Simon says, Simon's always right," River sing-songs from her seat against the wall.

"Not quite," Simon replies with brotherly annoyance. "I was just so convinced that I refused to listen to anyone's logic."

"But you were right," Kaylee says.

"Well, yes, that helps." He squeezes Kaylee a little in response. "Still, if I'd listened to Meg a bit more, things might have been easier in the long run."

* * *

 

The array of letters from River sits on the top of Simon's desk mocking him. Once again, he's not smart enough to keep up with his little sister's leaps of logic. Not for the first time in his life, anger blossoms at his sister's incredible intelligence. It was one thing for her to surpass him in academics when she was a toddler and he was entering prep school. But now he knows River is desperately trying to tell him something and he's too stupid to find it.

It burns his pride as he continues to stare at the letters willing the magic word or sentence to pop out at him and break the code. There has to be a code; that's the only thing that could possibly explain the odd tone, the spelling errors, the fictional events and people.

Briefly, he considers waving Omar and asking him to look at the letters. River was always so excited when Omar accompanied him home on his visits. The two of them would sit together for hours talking theoretical physics and advanced mathematics while Simon updated Mother and Father on his studies. Of all of his friends, Omar is probably the only one almost as smart as River. But the fact that Omar works for the federal security service scares him. Something to do with improving the software firewalls for the climate control satellites on terraformed worlds (hacked so many times during the War that millions of credits had been lost when frosts killed the budding plants or much needed rain failed).

Omar is a great friend, but the truth is, Simon doesn't know who to trust. Even Meg thinks he's obsessing over nothing. Meg might get along with River better than any of his previous girlfriends, but that isn't saying much.

Eyes floating over lines he's already memorized, Simon wonders why his parents have never expressed surprise at River's letters. The only reason he knows they've received letters at all is because he asks every time he calls home. When he asks what River wrote about this time, Father summarizes it down to "school and friends. Lots of River-babble."

_River babble_. That description would aptly fit the nonsense flowing from every letter that's been delivered to Simon's flat since River went away to school. It would be comforting except that River's never babbled in her entire life. Every conversation always had a purpose, even if it was just for her own entertainment as she watched you try to keep up with every twist of logic that she threw at you.

It hits him suddenly and he knows that somewhere, River is laughing at his denseness. Maybe the letters River wrote to their parents contain the missing pieces he needs to figure out the cipher.

Simon quickly puts the letters away in his desk and locks it before checking to make sure he's presentable enough to show his face at the family estate. His vest and shirt are wrinkled from sitting all afternoon, but a coat hides the distasteful creases.

The front door of his apartment opens just before Simon reaches the foyer and Meg enters. Bags hang heavily under her coal black eyes - the badge of every first year resident at the hospital. Even on vacation from work, Simon bears similar marks, but his are earned from worry instead of lack of sleep. Meg sniffs the air and frowns as she looks at him. "I thought you were going to have dinner ready," she says.

Mentally, Simon winces as he remembers her morning call. "I've ordered something from the Thai place for you. It should be here in twenty minutes. My parents called earlier so I have to go out to the estate. I should be back before midnight," he replies.

A brief spark of hope lights in her eyes before exasperation overtakes it as she listens. "Simon, I've hardly seen you all week. Surely they can get along without you for a night."

He runs his hand through her short curly hair. "We'll have all day tomorrow after you've rested and before I go back to work. Trust me, I'd much rather stay here with you," he says earnestly, and then kisses her on the lips.

Meg pushes him towards the door. "I'm not saving you any leftovers."

Simon waits until he hears the door close before he pulls out his mobile to wave in an order for Meg's favorite dish as he runs to catch the tube.

The ride from Capitol City to his parents' home is always a long one, but today his desperation makes the forty-five minute transit seem like forty-five days. For most of the ride, he castigates himself for taking so long to realize what was missing. In any other circumstances, River would be laughing and teasing him about being so oblivious. _And now I don't know what she's doing or what's happening to her._

The tube stops at his destination before he gets around to imagining what River might be suffering right now. He sprints the rest of the distance to the estate and lets himself into the main house.

His entrance takes the butler by surprise. "Dr. Tam! Are you expected for dinner?"

"No, Raoul. I just need to pick up some papers from Father's study. I won't be long, I promise," Simon replies.

"If you wait, your parents should be home in half an hour or so."

"I'm in a rush," Simon says as he shuts the door of the study in Raoul's face.

Alone, he surveys the room trying to figure out where Father would store River's letters. The piles of papers in the categorized inboxes prove to be bills and invoices from work and payroll for the servants. The desk drawers contain information about business meetings.

Finally, Simon's exhausted every surface in plain sight. He remembers River laughing at how bad he was at finding Easter eggs or hidden presents. _Well, I never have to worry about you going criminal on me, I suppose. Or hiding my diary well,_ River said when she teased him. She was right. And he's failing her right now.

About to give up, he notices the locked secretary desk at the back of the room. In for a penny, in for a pound as the old saying goes. Unfortunately, Simon never learned to pick locks. The summer that River acquired that talent no one, family or servants, had any privacy. Simon banishes the memory and breaks the lock with brute force. He's too slow to stop several papers from sliding to the floor. After glancing to see they're not in River's handwriting, he ignores them and searches through the rest of the papers inside the desk.

A gasp at the study door causes Simon to look over to see Raoul's expression of scandal. Simon winces: he'd be scandalized too if he walked in to see someone rifling through the desk of his employer. Raoul leaves immediately. It won't be long until he notifies Gabriel and Regan. Simon redoubles his efforts and is rewarded with a stack of letters bound together with several paperclips.

Why would Father put River's letters under lock and key?

Immediately, Simon reads the letters one by one. His world shrinks to a white background, River's black flowing script, and her voice in his head. The spelling errors are immediately committed to memory and compared to the ones he's seen previously in the past year. He'll have to wonder at the odd tone later. He furrows his brow at the description of people he's never heard of and events that his sister couldn't possibly have attended since she's never left the grounds of the academy after going away the previous fall.

When voices echo in from the foyer, he scans the letters once again to commit them to memory before tucking the bulk of them into the inner pocket of his suit jacket. In his hand, he holds the two earliest ones and a third that is undated. He can already recite them down to each punctuation error. But he still hasn't broken the code.

There _is_ a code, though. He knows it. Feels it.

"Simon."

He looks over to see his mother and father standing at the entrance to the study. "What is it, son? Money? You know all you need to do is ask," Mother says while wringing her hands.

The tone is firm and gentle as always. Like horses, Simon. When we're in trouble, they talk to us like horses that will spook. It drives me mad.

"It's River."

"You're sister is fine, Simon," Mother says. It sounds like she's reading from a script. Her gaze briefly shifts to Father and Simon knows now who's written it. The only question is why.

"She's not fine. Didn't you look at the letters? Look at the letters."

"Uh, I'm looking at the letters," Father says. Simon recognizes the look of worry that passes between his parents. He should, it's the same one he gets from Meg any time the topic of River comes up.

"These phrases - they don't sound anything like her. Some of these words -- they're misspelled! She started correcting my spelling when she was three. I think there's a code."

"A code?" Mother asks, not bothering to hide her fear. If only Simon could believe any of it was for their daughter.

"Yes."

Father laughs. "I always thought it was River who was lost without her big brother. Now I'm beginning to wonder if it isn't the other way around."

Simon wants to scream. Instead he skims the undated letter for what caught his eye earlier. "Did you have a good time at the D'arbanville ball this year?"

"What are you -"

"River thought it was duller than last year. But since we don't know anybody named D'arbanville, I'm having trouble judging." Anger clouds his normal caution and causes him to shout. "Did you even read these?"

"Of course I did," Father answers.

"It's one of her silly games. You two are always playing games," Mother adds.

Be careful about crying wolf, River. How many times did they tell his sister that?

"She's trying to tell us something that somebody doesn't want her to say."

"Simon, this is paranoia. It's the stress. If they heard you talking like this at the hospital, it could affect your entire future," Mother says as she rubs his arm.

Simon shakes her off. "Who cares about my future?"

"You should," Father warns as he joins Mother at Simon's side.

"You're a surgeon in one of the best hospitals in Capitol City. On your way to a major position, maybe even the Medical Elect. You're going to throw all that away? Everything you've worked for your whole life?" Mother asks.

Father grabs his shoulder and looks him in the eye. "Being a doctor means more to you than just a position. I know that."

Simon feels dizzy from their tag team approach. His mother's voice takes on a sing-song quality. "A few months time, you'll turn around and there she'll be. Now, nothing is going to keep you apart for long."

Except the school does. "They won't let us visit. She hasn't come home once. Not even for the holidays!"

"Simon, really. Get a grip and open up your eyes before you lose your position and Meg," Father commands.

"Meg? You don't like Meg. The one time I brought her home for festival, Mother waved and said surely I could do better than the daughter of a maid!" Mother blushes and looks away.

"Your mother was hasty. It's obvious to me that Meg has your best interests at heart even when you are being unspeakably daft and rude. Just the other day she came to discuss how worried she is about you," Father says.

Simon staggers. "Meg came here?" He puts a hand on the broken secretary behind him. This can't be happening. Meg wouldn't.

"She's at her wit's end, Simon. If you don't open your eyes, you're going to lose the best thing that has happened to you. Worse, you'll probably end up blaming River for it."

"You're father's right, Simon. Trust us; everything is going to be fine. We'd never let anything bad happen to you or River. You're our children."

Simon stops clenching his fists when he hears paper tearing. He looks down at the ripped paper almost expecting to see his sister's blood dripping off of it. Why won't they listen?

Carefully, he folds the papers and nods. "Of course, you're right." While they both flash victorious looks at each other, he puts the letters in his breast pocket with the others. "If you'll excuse me, I'm running late. Meg and I were to have dinner in the city together."

He can't get away from the house and to the tube station fast enough.

The return ride to Capitol City is a blur. They didn't listen. They won't hear. Then again, how could he have been such a fool as to think that they would? It's not that they're necessarily bad parents - at least not when everything is fine – but they don't listen. How can they be more concerned with how their son appears than with the safety of their daughter?

When his foot hits pavement, his line of thought switches tracks. Meg, how could she go behind his back like that?

He remembers telling River before she left for school that he might propose to Meg.

> _"Wait, Simon. Don't rush into anything." _

_"We've been dating for a year, silly. We're definitely not rushing. Besides, it's better to do it soon before you get all your degrees and are too busy at work to come be a bridesmaid." _

_River's eyes roll. "I'm NOT wearing a hideous dress." _

_"Pastel pink, with pretty blue and yellow ribbons I think." _

_She punches his shoulder. "Go slow. Move in together. Give Mother a bit more time to adjust to it." _

_"Do you think she ever will?" _

_"Miracles have happened before, or so the major religions say." She looks at him in that way she has – as if she's aged twenty years before his eyes and it's _his_ big sister giving him advice. "I just want you to take the time to make sure she's the one. That she'll be there for you when you need her. That you both love each other enough to not choose your careers instead down the line." _

"I do, River. Trust me, I do."

"But are you as certain about her?"

Simon's suddenly glad that he took River's advice.

When he opens the door to his apartment, he finds Meg dozing on the sofa with several screens worth of medical texts lying around her and boxes of cold Thai food on the coffee table in front of her. Any other time, he'd find the scene cute and cover her with a throw while cleaning up the mess. Now, he just slams the door and tries not to pay attention to any happiness he feels when she wakes with a jump.

"Simon," Meg says sleepily. "Are your parents okay? Did you get everything taken care of?"

Simon starts picking up the leftovers and taking them to the kitchen so he has something to do with his hands. Never before has he felt such an urge to punch a wall, not a good thing to do when your livelihood depends on your hands. "They're fine. They send their love. My father, especially. He found enlightenment from the chat the two of you had the other day."

"Oh." Her tone says it all.

All he can do is ask the three words that have been echoing around his head since he stepped off the tube in Capitol City. "How could you?"

Disbelief flows over her face. "How could I? Simon, take a step back and look at how you've been acting for the past few months! You spend all night pouring over those letters before going into surgery exhausted. When you do sleep, you wake from nightmares screaming River's name. Tell me, what was I supposed to do? Sit by until you managed to kill a patient because you got distracted by River's latest spelling mistake? Watch you become one of those crazy homeless people trying to find the code in the morning news that will prove the government is drugging the water supply? Wait until your mother told one and all that if her son hadn't been dating the daughter of a maid, someone would have been able to get you the help you need?"

"You're just like them. It's all about how I reflect on you. It doesn't matter what River might be going through."

"Stop it; just stop it, Simon," Meg yells. "She's your _sister_. She's living her own life. It's about damn time you started doing the same instead of mooning over her. Frankly, it's beginning to freak me out. Her life or mine, Simon. Choose."

"Meg, just look at the letters. She needs help."

"You mean she needs you. Fine, go then. Just don't come back here."

He stares dumbly at her, but Meg just crosses her arms and glares back. Briefly, he tries to think of a way to convince her, but then he remembers the letters and the months of worry and Meg's continual insistence that it's just another of River's little games.

"If it had been you, River would have helped me find you," he says. Then he's out the door and running down the fire stairs and wondering what he's supposed to do now.

* * *


	2. Chapter 2

Mal's talking to Zoe about options for their first job as they lock down the ship for the night. Zoe catches his arm before he stumbles over Jayne's stretched out feet. Jayne, who's sitting in the middle of the corridor that leads to the galley.

"What in the gorram hell are you doing?" Mal demands.

"Stop making such a ruckus. They'll hear," Jayne growls.

Mal looks at Zoe. She shrugs. Just as he's about to ask if Jayne is going space-crazy without even being in space, they hear a voice. "That bitch. I can't believe she did that."

"Was that Kaylee? Who's she talking about?" Mal asks.

"An old girlfriend of Simon's," Jayne answers. "If you can believe anyone would wanna date his pansy ass."

"So you're eavesdropping," Zoe observes.

"Amazing what you can hear when the ship's powered down," Jayne says with a sly grin on his face. Mal tries not to think about the kinds of things Kaylee's been up to that Jayne's been listening in on. Then again, better Jayne listen to Kaylee than be a participant. Still, Mal gets ready to pound on Jayne some for his remark when the other man signals for quiet. "Oh, this ought to be good. Simon's saying how he went to a bar to drown his sorrows after his gal threw him out."

"Scoot over. This I gotta hear," Zoe says as she drops to the floor.

Mal tries to remember exactly when he decided it would be good to have a crew. Shaking his head, he follows Zoe to the floor. Might as well listen – it is the first thing in weeks that Zoe's been interested in.

* * *

 

Simon's on his third scotch by the time Omar shows up. "Well, at least it's not sake," Omar remarks with a wry smile as he sits down at the bar next to Simon.

"What are you doing here?"

Omar gulps down the shot that the bartender sets in front of him and then plays with his glass. "Meg called. She didn't think you should be alone."

"She throws me out of our apartment, but doesn't think it's safe for me to be left alone. Great, just great."

"No one should be left alone to sulk about a broken relationship. That only ends with embarrassing drunken apologies over the cortex or very bad rebounds."

"I'm fine. You can go about your business with a free conscience." Simon says as he gives an unsteady wave of dismissal that is reflected in the mirror behind the bartender. He doesn't know whether to be angry that Meg is managing to butt into his life even now, or hopeful that this means he wasn't completely wrong at her. _That doesn't matter. River first, and maybe afterward there will be a way to salvage everything else_. Resolved, Simon downs his scotch in one gulp and signals for the bartender to set up another round.

"Come on, Simon, don't be like that. Just because it isn't working out between you two, doesn't mean she hates you. Though I never did figure how you ended up with her in the first place."

Simon sees Omar sign to the bartender to water their drinks. It won't make much of a difference with the head start he's had. "Probably because I hadn't been arrested by her brother when she met me." It's never easy knowing your best friend always wanted your girl, but Simon had been happy enough to beat Omar just once at something.

"Ah, but you were bailing out the bloke her brother arrested."

Simon remembers well. They both arrived at the front desk at the same time - Meg was asking to have her brother paged and he was asking after Omar's bail. I'm such a sucker for knights in shining armor, she'd said.

"What did she say other than asking you to prevent any more naked singing events?" Simon asks.

"About the fight? Nothing really." Simon rolls his eyes at Omar's predictability and asks for another round of shots. "Okay, okay, just don't give yourself alcohol poisoning." Omar pinches his nose, a tell that Simon is familiar with from their Tall Card days in college. "She said you've been obsessing about River."

Simon lets loose with every Mandarin curse he knows. "It was a bit more than that. She went to my parents."

"What?" Simon enjoys Omar's look of disbelief. No doubt, Omar had been preparing to tell him to formulate the biggest apology known in the history of man and go back crawling on his knees before the best thing that ever happened to him got away.

It already did. What if I never get River back?

"She went and told my parents that I was cracking up over River. That perhaps they'd be able to get through where she hadn't."

"Oh…" This time it's Omar who signals for more drinks. "Leave the bottle."

Simon continues to explain when the bartender leaves. "I found out when I tried to get them to look at River's letters. I didn't figure out the message until after I left, but I doubt it would have made a difference."

"Message?"

"Nothing, forget I said anything. No need to have a fourth person tell me I'm insane today."

Omar grabs Simon's arm and stops him from pouring another drink. "Simon, I knew you were insane in undergrad. Nothing is going to change that. But if you think River's sent you a message, I'd be the last one to say that you were wrong. Tell me."

"You won't believe me. Or worse, you will and I'll be right and you'll be forced to report it all to your bosses. Then I'll disappear and River will still be-" Simon downs his drink before finishing.

Omar scoffs. "Either you've already pickled your brain or the sake last month rendered you deficient. Yeah, I'm working on the climate control sats, but that's so the people forced to emigrate don't die when they're dropped. Remember which of us protested for the release of the Browncoat veterans." Omar empties the last of the bottle into his glass. "I like your brat sister more than you most of the time even if she does make me feel like Newton talking about gravity to Einstein. Now I'm going to order us some coffee and you're going to tell me what this message was."

When Simon left his apartment, he'd immediately started perusing the letters even as his conversation with Meg echoed in his mind. It hadn't taken long before he found the missing pieces of the code in River's letters to his parents.

Then he started trying to figure out what he could do about it. All alone. He's not particularly charismatic or savvy about the seamy underside of the city. His parents think that he's losing it and Meg's jealous of his sister.

The next thing he knew, he was at the bar.

"It was a code. It took all the letters to figure it out. Who knows how many she sent earlier that got pulled by censors or something."

"Simon, the message. What did it say?" Omar's rubbing his left eyebrow. In cards, it would mean that Simon was about to win all of Omar's weekly stipend and his friend would be spending the next week groveling to his own parents for money to make rent. Now, it's touching and eases Simon's burden a little bit.

He's not alone anymore.

"It was just six words. _They're hurting us. Get me out._."

"Fuck."

That sobers Simon up quick. Omar never curses, not in any language. "What?"

"I'd heard rumors. I didn't... I couldn't believe them."

Shouting, Simon pushes Omar. "Rumors, and you didn't say anything –"

"Be quiet!" Omar's tone cuts off Simon's diatribe. He grabs the empty bottle of scotch and pulls Simon to a more secluded table. "If you know where to listen, you always hear rumors. Conspiracy theories are popular and pretty much impossible to prove."

"They – Meg says it's just another one of her games. That I'm overreacting."

"Maybe. Do you want to risk that?"

Simon grabs the table for support. The world had just shifted and the alcohol makes it hard to find his balance. "She's my sister," he says as he fights back tears.

"Of course she is. And if she's in trouble, we'll find a way to get her back."

"How?"

Omar scratches at the table with his fingers. He always draws fractal patterns when he's working out a particularly challenging problem. "I know some people from my protest days that know … well, some shady blokes. It'll be risky; moreover, it'll be _expensive_, but we should be able to get some information. Then we'll figure out what to do.

"In the meantime, you need to stop making people question your sanity for a little bit. Go to work. Play at being broken hearted over Meg. Be civil with your parents."

"There's no time," Simon says as he stands.

Omar forces him to sit back down and the pain of his grip on Simon's shoulder pierces through the alcohol fog that continues to pulse in waves across his brain. "This isn't the type of thing that you study for a couple of days and do the surgery, Simon. It's going to take time to find and gain the trust of people who _might_ know what's going on, let alone figure how to get River out. You have to be steady. Like it's the longest and most important surgery of your life."

"Okay."

"Good. Now let's hit another bar and then you can crash on my couch till Meg gets her own place."

* * *

 

Kaylee pulls away and sits up causing Simon to pause in. "Hitting another bar, that was his solution?"

"There wasn't anything else to be done that night," Simon explains. "As I was already drunk, it sounded like a fine plan.

"And did you ever explain anything at all to Meg?" Kaylee asks. It just seems wrong to her that Simon would just abandon the relationship. Granted, the girl had gone behind Simon's back to his parents. But she had good intentions. It makes Kaylee wonder how different she'd have acted in Meg's place.

"Tired of being second best at everything. It's not a position that agrees with most people," River explained from her seat on the floor.

Kaylee is momentarily confused until she glances back at Simon to see his eyes closed and arms crossed. Kaylee can understand Meg's jealousy of the closeness the Tam siblings share more than she can the way that Simon simply turned his back on his ex-girlfriend. "But you didn't even give her a chance!" Kaylee protests.

Simon shrugs and then hurries to rearrange the sheets when they start to fall off of him and to the floor. His modesty causes Kaylee to check the status of her own covering, but she can't help but join in River's giggles at Simon's discomfort. "Would it have really been fair to tell her the truth? Would it have been worth the risk? As it was, I nearly worked myself to death keeping up the appearance of a fine, young rich kid on the rebound while maintaining my position in the hospital. Everything depended on me being above reproach while Omar did his best to get any of his contacts to meet one of us about River and the Academy. Not to mention the magic acts I had to perform to appear to live the high life while squirreling away as much cash as possible in my apartment."

"Sounds lonely," Kaylee says as she reluctantly lets Simon pull her back to his side. "It still doesn't excuse how you treated her."

"Whose side are you on here?" Simon asks dryly. "You're right though, it was. I was constantly reminding myself that it would all be worth it if it meant that that day was the one that lead me closer to helping River. And then doing my best to ignore the disappointment when I went to bed each night with no progress."

Kaylee's own jealousy burns in her chest until she glances over at River and sees the sorrow from Simon's voice echoed in his sister's face. "How long?" Kaylee asks.

Simon shakes his head. "Honestly, I don't really remember anymore. Every day felt like an eternity, but it was probably more like seven or eight months."

* * *

 

Simon's exhausted when he walks out of surgery. He's been on call for the last seventy two hours and all he wants right now is to shower and sleep for three days. Not necessarily in that order. A nurse stops him before reaches the locker room and gives him a message card that he pockets. He remembers to smile and flirt with the pretty blonde - Omar wants him to take a date when they go out this week. It will cut into the cash he saves, but is a necessary evil.

Simon collapses on the bench in front of his locker and leans his head against the cold metal. Sleep beckons, but he should change. The message card falls out of his scrub pocket when he takes off his shirt. He almost tosses it into the locker to worry about later, but decides to go ahead and pop it in his pocket source box. He hasn't seen Gabriel or Regan for over two months, it's probably just an invitation (demand) to attend a family dinner later in the week.

Instead of a recorded vid message, letters flash on the screen after the card loads. It takes a few seconds to read the screen with sleep deprived eyes. A short message, but no signature - Omar most likely. Fifth and Shanghai , third table from the back. 18:30.

Odd. Omar knew Simon would be on service till eighteen hundred. It'll be almost impossible for him to reach the bar in time. Simon glances longingly at the showers before pulling a dress shirt on. He doesn't bother to waste time removing his scrub bottoms. He can't be late, just in case.

The tube ride to Fifth Street is broken by bouts of microsleep. Fortunately, Simon isn't carrying any money right now; otherwise, he'd be a perfect target for muggers. Looking down at himself, he realizes that they'll probably ignore him since he's wearing a dress shirt and vest with blue hospital scrub pants. Omar will get a laugh out of this.

Shanghai and Fifth Street, The Drunken Swan. He lost his favorite pair of cufflinks here in a Tall Card game once during college. He finds the designated table empty so he sits down and orders the one drink minimum. He's too tired to wonder what he'll do if Omar doesn't show up since he doesn't even have his ident on him to pay out of his main accounts.

Half a drink later, Omar arrives, breathless and still in his civil service uniform. He fails to bat an eye at Simon's outfit. "I'll pay for your drink - you need to get to Exeter and Half in a quarter of an hour. Go through a red door and someone else will give you instructions."

"What are you talking about? That's in the Blackout Zone."

"Yeah, and in that get-up, you'll fit right in. Wait, you came from work. Do you have any money? I don't know if what I have will be enough. Hopefully they'll believe there's more where this came from." A wad of bills and a pill case move across the table before Simon can properly process Omar's meaning.

"A meet? Finally? Who? What?"

"I don't know. All my contacts are as skittish about my current job as you were at the beginning. This may just be a dead end or it may be the first tag of a long night of meetings. Be careful and avoid the Feds, will ya?"

Simon pockets the money and tries to think of everything he needs to know. Omar pulls him out of his chair and leads him to the door. "No time for me to coach you again. You know what to do and if you don't leave now, you won't make it on time. Good luck."

With that, Simon begins walking down the street towards the Blackout Zone. Omar had anticipated that eventually Simon would need to go into one of the city's dark areas alone and had been coaching him on where the entrances were and what to do when he got inside. Still, it was no easy feat to avoid patrols, camera sentries, and find the hidden entrances. Simon had never gotten to do a cold run because it was too risky to attract attention by being bound by law for any infraction.

Pulling an iodine supplement from Omar's pill case, Simon thanks the Browncoat terrorist for only setting off a dirty bomb with the EMP devices during the war. Granted, was vast acres of land where to this day the Security drones are inoperable and the background radiation is high enough to discourage human settlement. But at least medicine could protect one from Osirus's Blackout Zone: the oldest ones on Londinium and Athens were caused by terraforming accidents and a visit means contracting nasty, chronic (and deadly in the case of Athens) illnesses.

The closest "official" entrance displays the normal yellow caution and no entrance signs in English, Mandarin, and several other tongues that are still spoken with regularity on Osirus. Armed Feds look out over the rest of the city in boredom. Few people ever have need to get official permission for the Blackout Zone and those without avoid these entrances.

It takes ten minutes for Simon to locate the nearest hidden entrance to the Zone. A series of knocks results in a small grubby paw being stuck out a hole in the border fence. Simon places a few coins in the small hand and it withdraws. Seconds later it sticks out again and Simon adds more of the small amount of cash Omar had given him earlier.

This time, the payment is deemed sufficient and Simon hears the sound of movement behind the wall before a hole crumbles open in the ground next to him. Simon grimaces. He'd forgotten that some of the entrances are little more than well camouflaged holes under the fence. So much for a clean shirt and vest.

By the time he reaches the other side, Simon's attire fits in well with that of the Blackout Zone's residents. It takes a few minutes for Simon's eyes to adjust from the well lit environs of Capitol City to the torch light of the Zone. When it does, he sees that he lucked out and entered the Zone near the corner of Exeter and First. He only has a block to travel before reaching Half. He spots the red door of the designated meeting place easily.

Only as he's opening it does he wonder how his contacts will know him. Omar said that someone would give him instructions, nothing more. Fortunately he doesn't have long to worry before a purple haired waitress walks up to him. She starts to speak - actually looking at her expression, Simon thinks she's fixing to yell – but stops herself when the bartender yells something at her in a language foreign to Simon. It sounds German. She shrugs and hands Simon a piece of paper.

>   
> _Bilter's Cave_. 

 

Simon's eyebrows go up upon reading the name of the next destination. Bilter's Cave is a bar infamous for the many illicit activities that reportedly occur in its basement depths for clients with enough money. Everyone knows its location even if they'd never dream of entering the Zone to find out if any of the rumors are true. Allegedly even the Feds steer clear of it during raids for fear of catching a member of the ruling council in a compromising position.

Simon exits the bar the same way he came in only to find that the skies have opened up to release torrents of rain during his short time inside. Now he's covered in mud that is mixing with the once dried blood of his hospital scrub pants. Desire for warmth adds even more speed to his steps as he hurries to make the meet.

Entering Bilter's Cave, he finds it to be nothing like what he expected. Rumors made it out to be a place as sumptuous as the finest resorts on Ariel or Sihnon. Simon can only assume that the decorating budget was spent on secret lower levels because the main bar is…well, the term "bar" can only be used loosely in relation to the place that Simon enters. A few colored light bulbs dangle from bare wires at random places in the ceiling illuminating a room whose ambience would only improve with darkness. Scrap metal has been used to construct a rough serving bar with random crates stacked for chairs and tables. Simon would be hard pressed to tell whether the bartender or the filthy glasses contributed more grit to the drink he now holds.

He goes and stands at an empty "table". He's glad that his attire is already ruined. He can only imagine how much extra dirt his clothes will pick up in this place. Thankful that all his inoculations are up to date even if he isn't swallowing, he pretends to sip at his drink while studying the room. He still knows nothing about his contact, but his experience at the previous establishment leads him to believe that someone will recognize him. He tries not to let the question of _how_ worry him too much.

After two hours of waiting, Simon is thirsty and wishing he'd brought his own water to drink. The alcohol should kill most things, but he's not willing to risk his sight on the quality of the rotgut being served. He buys another drink when the bartender starts glaring at him though.

His watch shows that he only has another forty-five minutes before the guards change. Sunrise will occur shortly after and will strand him in the Blackout Zone if he stays longer than that.

"Looking for someone?" a deep voice asks.

Looking up, Simon does his best to project not-so-innocent bystander. Not for the first time, he thinks that Omar should be handling this part if rescuing River is actually going to work. "Just having a drink." Simon replies.

"I don't know, looks like you could use some friendly company," the man says. "You should come with me."

Simon tries not to blanch, he really does. Despite his looks and sometimes awkward manners with women, he doesn't swing that way at all and he's never gotten good at refusing the sly offers he attracts. And the last thing he wants to do in the middle of a Blackout Zone is to piss off the heavily tattooed, steroid-muscled, six foot-four (if an inch) red haired giant in front of him. "Th..Thanks for the offer," he stutters. "But I'm really not in the moo-mood for company."

Laughter belts out of the red giant and causes all activity in the bar to stop for a minute. Simon hopes that they aren't used to that sound signaling 'roid-rage or something equally deadly.

"Doc, you're damn funny. They said you would be," the giant says. He leans on the table to bring his mouth close to Simon's ear. "Now then, I think we have business that would be better handled in private, no?"

Simon flinches when the man's tongue flicks out and licks his face. He resists the urge to wipe it off, nodding instead. If this isn't the contact, he is so very screwed.

"Then come on, pretty boy, I ain't got all night and I can think of much more fun ways to spend it than in this hole."

* * *

 

River and Kaylee interrupt Simon's tale with gales of laughter. "And with that, I think it's way past time for sleep. I don't want to give Mal another reason to be cross with me if you're too tired to do anything," he tells Kaylee.

"Spoilsport," she says. A sound attracts both of their attention. "River, what's wrong?"

"Empty, ship's too empty. Ghosts hang in the corners."

Mentally, Kaylee says goodbye to what she had planned for Simon after the story ended. River had actually been sleeping alone the past few nights, but Kaylee understands if Simon's story might have dredged up bad memories for the teen, both new ones and old ones. She elbows Simon and gives him a quick nod.

"Go get your mattress, mei-mei, and we'll have a sleepover," he tells River.

"And you two get decent while I'm gone," River orders.

"Brat," Simon calls out, throwing a pillow at the door as River scampers out.

Kaylee laughs.

Simon leans over the bed and then sits up holding Kaylee's shirt and underwear. "I believe these are yours."

"My hero," Kaylee says with a laugh right before she starts tickling him.

* * *


	3. Chapter 3

Mal spends the night thinking of Simon and his sister. Both make appearances in his dreams, which is not something he ever wants happening, even if it does mean a break from the usual nightmares of war and failure. He isn't surprised when he finds Simon up and awake before everyone else on the ship. Well, everyone except Zoe, but she hasn't slept much of late unless Mal issues an order or Jayne gets her drunk.

Simon nods to him and Mal smiles a bit at how much the doctor isn't a morning person. Upon first laying eyes on the core-born, rich Simon, Mal figured he'd have been perky right throughout the day. Instead, Simon rivals Jayne for early morning surlishness.

Still intrigued by last night's tale, Mal decides to take advantage of the absence of the rest of the ship. "Seemed like you cut your tale off a little abruptly last night."

Simon's brow furrows. "You were eavesdropping?"

"Those dorm walls are thin. I think Jayne started out listening to something else, but when Zoe and I joined, it was the Dashing Adventures of the Heroic Simon," Mal says.

"Anything but."

"Was it for Kaylee that you stopped or River?"

"What makes you—"

Mal shakes his head. "You'd met your contact. Figure you were going to ask for proof next. Given how things turned out, I'm willing to bet that he gave you some." When Simon remained silent, Mal continues. "Figure whatever they gave you was probably dangerous. Guilt ridden, honorable fella like you probably didn't share whatever evidence you had with anyone. Otherwise I suppose your folks or someone might have helped you a little more in your adventure."

"It wasn't an adventure, it was a nightmare."

Mal nods and takes a long drink of his coffee. "Been awake during a few of those myownself. Thing I've learned is that the nightmare doesn't return as often if you have someone else around that understands it. Zoe knows about the war. Wash, well, we shared Niska. That monster didn't haunt me much till I was the only one left." Mal doesn't like being this open with things, but right now it's just him and Simon. The ones their memories will hurt aren't around and that can be a freeing thing.

"It's not just that I don't know how much of that time that River remembers. You all look at her as different enough. I don't want to set her apart anymore."

"Your sis has been apart all of her life. She's an odd bird, but she's a part of this ship and ain't nothing going to change that. The worst that nightmare you're holding back can do is give the rest of us a little bit more understanding about just what she's been through."

Simon nods and then they both sit in silence finishing their coffee. Mal's about to give up and go about his business when Simon starts speaking quietly. Out of the corner of his eye, Mal spots Kaylee and Zoe in the doorway behind Simon. With his eyes, Mal tells Zoe to go away and she takes Kaylee with her. Best to hear exactly what Simon was protecting them from rather than betray Simon's confidence.

* * *

 

Red, as Simon nicknames him when it becomes apparent that no real names will be offered, gets down to business quickly once he has Simon alone in what appears to be a storage closet full of bottles. Simon tries not to wrinkle his face - something in the room smells like rotting meat.

"First off, lose your friend, Omar. We see you talking or communicating with him, you'll never hear from any of us again. Don't get me wrong, he was a good bloke back in the day, but now he comes with the wrong kind of scrutiny. He's fooling himself if he thinks he's ever been off the Fed watch list after his youthful indiscretions."

"He won't like that," Simon says. Fact is, Simon doesn't like it either. Omar comes from the same background as Simon, but Omar's the rebellious one who's reached out for every type of experience available. Simon can't imagine doing this all on his own.

"Well, I don't give a fuck. All I want to do is stay out of a dark, wet cell. You wanna see your sis again, you better get in the same mindset," Red says, punctuating his words with a firm finger jab into Simon's chest.

"River – how soon can you get her out?"

Red snorts. "Listen, Doc, this ain't going to be any quick and easy thing. Even if we could lay our hands on her right this second, you have to know that those who have her will come after you strong and hard to get her back. Not to mention the fact that she's probably more dangerous than those that will be hunting you."

Simon shakes his head. "She's just a little girl. Besides, she'd never hurt me."

Red looks down on him as he lights up a cigarette. Simon glances at the corner of the room where a puddle has formed from several leaking bottles. Hopefully the contents aren't flammable.

"How long has it been since you've seen your sis?" Red asks after Simon refuses a cigarette of his own.

"Almost two years now."

Red jumps when they hear a loud crash from upstairs. He grabs Simon and pulls him out of the closet and starts leading him down a set of stairs deeper into the bar. He whispers as they walk. "In that time, four kids have come out of that place. Three dead. My source says they were suicides. The fourth, he's in St. Lucy's."

St. Lucy's is the largest mental hospital on Osirus. "Why?"

"Paranoid schizophrenia or something that looks just like it. They got enough sedatives in the kid at any time to put down an elephant, and they still have to keep him in restraints to keep the staff safe. There's nothing to say you're sister won't be the same."

"What are they doing to her?"

Red stops at a metal door and opens it to the outside. Torchlight drifts in and highlights the blue tattoos on the man's face. "If I knew that, we'd be putting it on the Cortex and get all those kids out. You figure out a way to help your sis, you're going to let us know. Lots of other families will need that info."

Red whistles and a skinny, black girl with more piercings than Simon's ever seen appears out of the darkness. Red takes off his coat and gives it Simon. "Rain's not gonna stop any time soon and you can't risk a Fed pulling you in for looking like a public drunk. We'll be in contact. In the meantime, there's a chip in the pocket with a bank account number. Deposit a thousand credits every week and we'll start the ball rolling. Don't go over a thousand or eyes might start looking into your finances."

"Wait, I'm just supposed to believe that you know where River is? Or that any of this is true?"

Shouts from down the street attract Red's attention. "Look, Doc, I don't have time to convince you right now. They're doing a sweep. Get out of the zone. If you still have doubts, come back here next week."

Pierced Girl doesn't offer her name either. "Don't fall behind. I ain't a nanny."

"Charmed, I'm sure," Simon says as he takes off in a jog to keep up with her loping pace. She deposits him at a different entrance and doesn't ask for anything in return. "Get bound, you better forget where this is," she says as she dismantles a metal door from the wall. He crawls through and when he looks back, seamless metal is all that he sees.

"Wham, bam, thank you, Simon," he says to no one before looking down at his clothes. Once blue scrubs are now brown and he can no longer see any design through the dirt on his vest. He shrugs on Red's coat and is unsurprised that what on Red was knee length almost drags the ground on him.

He makes his way back to his apartment without any problems. On the way, he begins to feel that the entire night has been one huge waste. He has no intention of turning money over to these people without any way to contact them other than hoping they'll flag him down if he returns to Bilter's Cave. More likely, they'll all have moved on and be enjoying the high life with any money he deposits in their shadow account.

Once inside, curiosity causes him to pat down the coat to find the banking chip even before getting clean or changing his clothes. Surprisingly, he finds two – one a normal banking chip, the other, a cortex memory chip. The paranoia that Omar has worked so hard to cultivate prevents Simon from playing it on anything other than his stand-alone source box that lacks a constant connection to the United Cortex feed.

The words _R Tam Session 1 excerpt _ appear and then Simon gasps when he sees his sister smiling back at him. She's talking about her college classes and the nickname that she hated. "They call me Little Mouse," she says. He remembers her complaints about it and agreeing with her that she had the other students fooled. In his opinion, there's never been anything quiet about River. Simon sits down on the couch and watches the interview continue.

The screen fades to black after she asks the interviewer if she can still dance at the special school. Static takes over for a second before more black and white footage fills the screen again. _R. Tam Session 22 excerpt._ The interviewer is the same man as before, but River seems different. Unsure.

River has never been unsure for a moment in her life.

"I don't think – I'm sorry – I think there's been an error. I don't think…I think I may not be the right subject for these…for this program," River says, stuttering. Simon finds it hard to breathe suddenly. River's never stuttered; not even when she started talking at the age of two. No, it's always been full sentences for his little sister with hardly a pause to catch her breath.

The interviewer argues with her, says that she was the one that wanted out of Gen Ed. The look of despair on River's face makes Simon resolve to throttle the man if he should ever come upon him.

A stutter on the video and then River utters something that Simon can't quite catch. "Tell me what you see," the interviewer instructs.

River describes a failed medical procedure. Simon's blood chills when she echoes what the interviewer once said: "We're doing such good work." After, it looks like she's going to throw up.

Simon's heart breaks when River asks to see him. He wants to scream when the man tells her that Simon is too busy. He's never in his life been too busy for River. Never.

Static flashes once more and then another title card: _R. Tam Session 165 excerpt_. This time River isn't sitting. Her voice has the same haunted quality as the previous recording, but it's also manic. Nothing she says makes sense. Red's description of the boy committed to St. Lucy's could well apply to River, except for the lack of violence. But then River begins to talk about not trusting the mattress and gutting it.

"Oh, River," Simon says. "What are they doing to you?"

Worse, River seems to know that no one understands what she's saying. The words of both the interviewer and River only confuse Simon more. Movement trainers? What does that have to do with his sister becoming delusional? Why does River want a mission?

"I am not here for nothing," River practically shouts. "I am a…spy. You know I'm a spy. There's something wrong with the body politic." Simon jumps and almost drops the player when River falls over the table screaming in pain, in fear. "Cut it out, cut it out."

Static. _R. Tam. Session 416 First Excerpt._ The room is darker than in the other sessions. Simon can't figure out how much time is passing between any of them, but River's appearance is messier than ever. Her hair hangs in her face and she slumps forward. Instead of manic, she seems depressed.

"How did your session with Dr. Matthias go?" the interviewer asks.

"He gave me a mission," River replies. Her tone is flat.

"Really?" the interviewer asks, skeptically. "Did he tell you your mission out loud, or did you just hear it?"

"He plays hide and seek with me," River says.

"Dr. Matthias?"

"My brother," River answers. Simon pulls the player closer, looking for a clue. "He's a doctor. He thinks he can find me, but I'm deep down and I do not make a sound." Simon pauses the video and replays that section. He wishes he knew when it was taken. Was it when he was desperately trying to figure out the coded letters? Or later, when he was keeping up appearances at the hospital waiting for Omar. Finally, he lets it finish.

"River, what mission did Dr. Matthias give you."

River refuses to answer. "I'll have to write it down," she says as she holds her hand out.

Static again. _R. Tam. Session 416 Second Excerpt._ River is absent. The interviewer begins to choke and then to grab at his neck. Wet sounds, ones that Simon recognize as blood pouring into a windpipe take over. The interviewer throws a pen on the table. Black wetness smears the table and the interviewer's hand. He tries to get up, but falls to the ground. Simon startles when River appears in frame. Her hands are covered with black wetness as well. Her eyes are haunted. "I can see you," she says before static blacks out the screen.

Simon drops the source box. Shocked, he tries to deny the implications of the vid and the info that Red gave him.

They've made River mad. Worse, they've made her dangerous.

But she knows Simon is looking for her. She still knows he's her brother. He can only pray she knows he's on her side as well.

* * *

 

Mal waits for a bit when Simon falls silent. "What did you do with the memory chip?"

Simon plays with his empty cup. "Played it back a few hundred times before I started to worry what would happen if anyone found it. I dumped it in a bottle of sulfuric acid."

"Anyone ever tell you that you have an inclination for overkill?"

"The same one that said you make crappy plans."

Mal laughs. Collecting the dirty cups, he turns his back on Simon. "It's your story to tell when you feel like it," he says as he washes the dishes.

The rest of the day is spent like so many of the previous. Despite how hard he's ridden the crew to keep their focus on fixing the ship instead of falling apart, Mal guesses that the repairs are just about as done as they are going to get. River has also told him point blank that she's had quite enough of the remedial piloting sessions that he's been giving her.

It'd been Zoe's idea that they'd need a third person to pilot the ship. Neither of them were in the mood to hire a new pilot, which left them choosing from the crew. Jayne wasn't a candidate for obvious reasons, Kaylee would be too busy with the engines. Inara…Well, they couldn't count on Inara staying with the ship. He'd asked Simon about it when River started laughing out loud and Simon's cheeks turned blood red.

"What's so funny?" he'd demanded.

"I think she remembers how many shuttles I crashed in secondary school," Simon mumbled as he grabbed his sister's wrist and dragged her from the room before she could elaborate.

That had left River. He'd been ready to bring up the topic of a new hire with Zoe, but had abandoned it when he found her crying over a load of clean laundry, one of Wash's Hawaiin shirts held tightly in her hands. The next day, he'd started training River. If you could call it that.

After River ends the latest tutorial, Mal takes stock of the state of the ship and finds that everything should be ready to fly. Five hours later (and one less Operative that he hopes to never see again), he and Serenity are where they belong. In the black.

Dinner that night is subdued until Jayne, of course, breaks the silence.

"So, what'd you and the tattooed man get up to in the back room?" Jayne asks with his characteristic leer.

Simon rolls his eyes. "Is there anyone on board that didn't listen in last night?"

Inara raises her hand. "But Zoe filled me in this morning."

"Good to know everyone's up to date. I do so hate repeating myself," Simon replies. His glance at Mal holds a question and Mal shakes his head. He's a little insulted that Simon would have to ask if Mal had kept his confidence, but now's not the time to fight that battle.

"My contact gave me a banking chip with the information of how much money they expected and showed me to the door after telling me not to try to contact them," Simon summarizes. "I didn't see or hear from them again for months."

"Knew it was gonna be boring," Jayne grumbles before Simon goes on.

* * *

 

Simon's jaw drops when he sees Omar standing in the hallway in front of Simon's apartment. It's been months since they last talked. Simon has avoided giving any explanation for the silence, choosing instead to ignore calls and forget dinner plans instead. It took a few weeks, but eventually Omar, like the rest of Simon's friends, gave up and stopped calling.

Simon wastes no time shutting Omar down. "I just worked a double shift and the only thing I want to talk to right now is my pillow," he says as he puts his palm on the key panel to open the door.

"A pot of coffee will cure that in no time," Omar answers with characteristic cheer as he slides past Simon and through the now open door.

Simon rolls his eyes and goes along with Omar for the moment. He's done all that Red and his colleagues have asked without question. Surely they won't blame him for being ambushed at his door by an overly persistent friend. Rubbing his face to try to wake up, he follows Omar inside and pulls up short when he runs into Omar's back.

"All you had to do was say you had company," Omar says. Simon steps around his taller friend to see that Red is sitting on the sofa with a small gun aimed at Omar. Simon tries to turn off the surgeon's voice in his head that helpfully points out how many organ systems will be destroyed if his friend is hit at this range by the weapon.

"This wasn't part of our agreement," Red drawls. Simon finds it difficult to read the man's face behind the multitude of tattoos, including a new holographic one that goes from the top of his left eye and down to his left ear, but the tone of voice carries Red's disapproval clearly.

Simon triggers the door to shut before any late night wanderers can spy in. "I don't recall giving you permission to enter uninvited either."  
Red shrugs. "Figured this would be safer since you got collared the last time you tried to visit my place."

"Simon, could you get your boyfriend to put the gun down?" Omar suggests.

Simon glances around the room and sees that Red has already drawn the blinds. "Why exactly are you both determined to keep me from my precious three hours of sleep?"

Red laughs. "You've gotten a thicker skin since we first met, I'll give you that, doc."

"And hopefully with what I pay you, I've earned a little trust. That's definitely not necessary," Simon says as he crosses to the kitchen. "Glad to know my funds are still enabling your tattoo aquisitions.

"You have, he hasn't," Red says gesturing towards Omar. "Now isn't a time to risk everything. He might be your buddy, but people change. You willing to risk that?" Red asks.

Simon's frustration at Red's slow pace in devising a rescue for River to explode. "And exactly what am I risking? It's been months and as far as I can tell, I'm no closer to even _seeing_ my sister, let alone getting her out."

"I think you forget who's helping who here," Red growls.

Simon starts to charge Red, but Omar moves between them and pushes Simon back a few steps. Hand in the center of Simon's chest, Omar takes over the conversation. "Fine, why are you here?"

Red finally lowers the gun, though he doesn't put it away. "We've got just about everything we need to break your sis out. Our insider tells us that we need to move soon, or … it'll be too late."

The news renders Simon speechless. _It'll be too late_ echoes in his ears and his vision goes dark. Distantly, he hears Omar take over. "What do you need us to do?"

"Doc needs to take a vacation from the hospital. Preferably one with a paper trail. We've got a kid that can pass for him so long as it's nowhere with ret scans. In the mean time, we'll prep him with what he needs to get in and out."

"I'm sensing a _but_," Omar says.

"We've got a transport lined up that'll take them both to Persephone. Trustworthy as far as any in the smuggling business can be, but it's going to be best if they only see the Doc. Less risk for everyone involved if the girl is kept under wraps until he puts distance between them and the Core. A lot of distance." Red pauses. "From what we know, you probably won't be able to tell her to sit nice and quiet in her bunk."

"Cryogenic stasis," Simon says instantly.

Omar turns. "That's insane. If River's unstable, cryo isn't going to help her recover mentally."

Simon shakes his head. "We have to get her out and off planet if she's going to have a chance at that. If I put her into cryo on the ship, all the smugglers will see is a box. Physically, she can safely stay in cryo for up to three weeks."

Red nods approvingly. "Three weeks would give you lots of time for traveling. No one ever looks twice at a traveling doctor on the Rim. Too busy asking for help to care why you left the Core. Expensive though."

Omar shakes his head. "Money isn't a problem. I can hack the supply order at the hospital. Who's miss one little cryo chamber?"

"I don't like it," Red growls.

"He won't know anything else. I can tell you what day the cryo chamber arrives and you can arrange a pickup for it," Simon suggests. "If anything, Omar will be assuming the risk. You'll know he's defrauded the hospital and the government."

The prospect of blackmail seems to mollify Red. "Fine, I'll have some help there to unload the merchandise at the docks," Red says as he stands and crosses to the door. "A car will pick you up at work tomorrow, Doc."

"Wait, I have things here I'll need."

"Pack 'em tonight, but leave them here. We'll have your stand-in deliver them to your ride in due time." Standing at the door to the apartment he looks back at them. "I still don't trust you, O, and I think the more involved you are, the more chance your boy has of getting spotted by the Feds."

"As long as you can deliver what you've promised, I don't really care what you think of me," Omar replies as Red shuts the door.  
His exhaustion evaporated, Simon leans against a wall for something solid to remind him that all of this is real and not a dream. It's happening. If everything went right, River would be safe. He doesn't know what kind of a life they'll have, but they'll be together and she'll be safe.

"Anything I can do?" Omar asks.

Simon shakes his head. "Just get the cryo chamber. And, Omar, thanks. For everything."

"Just don't let your little sister forget who the real hero was here," Omar replies with a smirk before exiting.

* * *


	4. Chapter 4

  
  
  
**Entry tags:** |   
[firefly fanfic](http://jebbypal.dreamwidth.org/tag/firefly+fanfic), [simon](http://jebbypal.dreamwidth.org/tag/simon), [the missing chapters](http://jebbypal.dreamwidth.org/tag/the+missing+chapters)  
  
---|---  
  
The Missing Chapters (4/4) - Firiefly

It isn't easy, but Simon manages to obtain vacation time starting the next day. He outright begs Caldwell to switch time with him. Liu and Prashnar extort opera and play tickets respectively in exchange for covering his on-duty days. Morovitz, as always, agrees only because it suits him to force Simon to work the next four holiday shifts. Ordinarily, the lie would bother him, but it is overruled by simply thinking of River. And the thought of the look on Morovitz's face when Simon doesn't return to work after his "vacation" ends doesn't hurt either.

He spends the rest of his time cataloging everything about the hospital that he'll never see again – state of the art equipment, sterile rooms, and educated personnel, there's nothing too small to say a mental goodbye to. Meg would be surprised; she used to like to say that the only thing he was sentimental about was River.

A hand on his arm wakes him from his reverie. "Simon," Meg greets him coldly. "Rebecca, from scheduling, told me that you're taking a vacation."

Simon glances around the nurses' station desperately looking for a distraction. He's no good at deception. Worse, experience has taught him that he's completely inept at it with Meg. "I just need to get away for a bit."

Meg's expression remains carefully blank, the one she's cultivated over the years when delivering unpleasant news to a patient's family. "You hate taking vacations alone. What's going on?"

She's right: the only time he likes to be alone is when he's reading journals or preparing to do a complicated surgery. He hears the worry in her voice even as she manages to keep it off of her face.

"Doctor, the chart?" a nurse asks. Simon nods and takes a few seconds to finish updating the chart pad he holds in his hands before handing it over.

He turns to fully face Meg. It takes all of his strength not to reach out and caress her face. _River, remember River and stay strong_. "Who said I was going alone?" Even though it's been months since they've talked about anything other than the odd few patients they've shared, her forehead crinkles in surprise and hurt. He wishes he could say goodbye to her in the way that she deserves and the way that his heart longs to. He doesn't know what he did wrong that she couldn't trust his instincts about River, but they've each made their choice.

Still, it's as hard to say goodbye to Meg forever as it is to leave the hospital, the only home he's ever really known.

"Oh," Meg answers in a clinical voice. "Well, have fun. Try to get some sun, will you? The scrub nurses have had a hard time distinguishing you from the lab coats lately."

He smiles as expected at the joke and watches the woman that he'd thought he'd always have in his life walk away from him.

* * *

 

An hour later, every bureaucratic detail involved in a last minute vacation and every patient chart has been dealt with. Simon's dressed again in street clothes and his gym bag contains another change of clothes, a pair of scrubs, and one very expensively packed doctor's bag, including several high end pieces of surgical equipment appropriated from the hospital. It should take a couple of days for the theft to be discovered since he logged the equipment as broken.

The previous night, Red had said that a car would be waiting to pick Simon up. It isn't until midday that Simon realizes that Red didn't say where the car would be waiting. After racking his brain, he decides that it would have to be outside the entrance by which he generally leaves every night. Not for the first time, Simon has to quash annoyance and paranoia at the fact that Red's group has been watching every move he makes. Worse, if he doesn't even know when he's being watched, how can he be sure that the government or the people who have River haven't been doing the same?

_Deep breaths and a clear mind, just like surgery_. Calm once more, Simon steps out the side hospital entrance that leads to the cab stands and tube entrance and into the rainy night. It's dark, but the hospital grounds are so well lit that it's about as bright as sunrise. In fact, one can only observe sunrise from the top of the hospital tower.

Simon pauses to look around when he reaches the sidewalk. Several cabs pull in and out of the taxi station to his right. The loading zone where patients are dropped off before their families leave to park their cars is empty. Pulling his rain coat tighter on his body and wishing he'd remembered to pack an umbrella (normally he just works through the designated precipitation times before catching the tube home), Simon struggles to remain calm.

Looking further down the street, he finally sees a small black car parked in front of the fire hydrant. When he turns to face it, the headlights blink once in acknowledgement. Relief courses through his body as Simon walks toward the car.

"Hurry up, the drones already marked me the last pass. Towing will be here if we're not gone pronto," a feminine voice says when he opens the door. Simon does a double take once he's in the car. It's the skinny, black pierced girl who led him out of the Blackout Zone the first night. Granted, she's dry and in suitable clothing, but he can see all the holes where she removed many of her excessive ornaments on her face and arms. Plus, he remembers the dangly ear chains with ruby and jade stone settings at each of the three entry points of the ear – mostly because he remembers how heartbroken River was when he wouldn't let her get her ears pierced with a similar pair on her tenth birthday.

He winces when he slams into the seat as the girl pulls the car abruptly into traffic. "We've met before, haven't we?" he asks.

"Dunno. All you purplebellies blend together to me," she answers as she weaves in and out of traffic lanes while keeping a close eye on the viewscreen showing the cars behind, beside, and above them.

"I'm not in the military."

"You live in the Core and you ain't working against them. That tells me enough about your color."

"The war's been over for six years," Simon says. Looking at her, he'd guess that the pierced girl might have been all of fifteen when the war ended…might. If pressed, Simon would estimate she's quite a bit younger than that. _Probably the same age as River when she left for school._

"Hard to remember that when it took everything from you. Get out," Pierced Girl tells him as she pulls the car into a storage lot and parks.

He does so and follows her to another car. Sliding in, he's surprised to see Omar in the front seat.

"Know where we're going?" Omar asks as Pierced Girl starts the engine.

"You'll both see," she answers as she pulls out and proceeds to repeat her erratic driving from before.

"What are you doing here?" Simon asks.

Omar shrugs. "Red decided the only way he could trust me was to watch me. So he "arranged" for a vacation for me as well. I always did want to go to Sihnon – I just wish I was actually getting to."

After that, they both fall silent. Pierced Girl doesn't encourage conversation and Simon is too nervous, worried, and tired to think of anything to discuss. About an hour later, the car exits the main traffic just outside the city and pulls into an underground parking garage. Pierced Girl leaves the car running when they get out and leads them away. Simon looks back when he hears the car pull away.

"Where are we?" Omar asks. Pierced Girl just ignores them and leads them through a door. The stairwell inside is poorly lit, but Simon can make out the faint blue stenciling on the wall, "Medical Technologies Incorporated, Helping Medicine to the Next Level".

"Didn't this place go out of business last year?" Simon asks, fully not expecting an answer.

"Two points for the brainiac," Pierced girl says as she looks back with raised eyebrows. "So you do keep up with what's going on in the world after all. MTI got bought out by Blue Sun. They're still trying to sell off this warehouse as part of the downsizing. It's empty and clean for now."

Three flights later, Simon and Omar see that she's right when they exit the stairwell into a wide, empty room lit only by several flashlights. "I see they are putting your money to good use," Omar says dryly.

"The price was right and I know the people hired to provide security," Red's voice says from an unlit corner. "It's big enough to give us room to run the Doc through his paces. Who knows, we might even prepare him well enough that he succeeds."

"With confidence like that, how could I fail?" Simon replies. His previous hope from the morning has evaporated. Suddenly it seems like his father was right and he's thrown everything he worked for away. Worse, how could this possibly help River?

* * *

 

"Tell me there's going to be some action at some point. So far my dreams are more entertaining than this," Jayne says.

"Jayne!" Kaylee, River and Inara all protest at the same time. Mal covers his mouth. Best not to let the womenfolk know how entertaining this is.

"What? He missed the chance to kiss his ex, and he's too uptight to get it on with the pierced one. If there's no fistfights or explosions, I got better things to do," Jayne explains.

"You're right. Septic needs clearing, best have a look at that," Mal orders as he stands to get a refill. Though he agrees with Jayne. Simon just has no sense of the romantic. He winks at Kaylee when she shoots him a grateful smile before turning her attentions back to Simon only to see that he's leaving the galley.

"Now see what you've done!" she yells at Jayne before hurrying after Simon.

Mal keeps a very straight face and leans against the wall of storage lockers watching the scene play out. After watching Kaylee pursue her brother, River returns her gaze to Jayne. Mal's pretty glad he generally manages to stay in her good graces. Her glare has every bit as much heat as Kaylee or Inara's. Not to mention the craziness.

"Better lock your bunk tonight, Jayne," Zoe advises as she puts her plate in the sink.

"Why? Worried you can't resist a real man anymore?" Jayne asks. Zoe just rolls her eyes and leaves the galley.

Mal chuckles. "What's so funny?" Jayne demands.

Looking between his pilot and his mercenary, Mal can't keep a straight face as he answers. "Zoe's right. Not every night that we remember to lock up the silverware." When Jayne looks back at River, she smiles sweetly before jumping up and skipping to the bridge. Mal quickly follows her just so Jayne won't see him laughing at his expense.

* * *

 

Simon's quiet for the next few days. At night, River hears Kaylee cajoling Simon for more of the story, but he always refuses. Only when he puts his mouth to work on hers does Kaylee give up entirely. River still listens, hopeful that somehow she'll learn the missing pieces to the story that led her to the now. Inara and Kaylee both encourage her to ask Simon on her own. She hears Zoe's silent agreement when Zoe overhears them talking in the kitchen. Yet River stays silent. All this time, he's never told her the how. She wants him to tell her without her asking. And she's always afraid that if she does ask, the smallest part of her will take over and demand to know why it took so long. _So very long._

When the days turn into weeks, River decides to take matters into her own hands. Every free moment that she has, River shadows Simon. It's easy to do; no one gets more involved in their own headspace than her brother. He never was particularly good at multitasking thought with diligence to his surroundings. As she watches, she listens not to what he says and does, but to all the things going on in the space between. Occasionally – but not often - his thoughts drift to Meg when he's doing inventory in the infirmary. Stolen moments together in pharmaceutical storage or the linen rooms during their internships. Memories of making their bed and preparing for their days together.

But those thoughts don't get River what she wants. She almost gives up, but then Mal gets a new job. A job that requires Simon's expertise to plan. As soon as he's alone with the details, Simon's memories open up and River sees Omar, Red, and the Pierced Girl as clear as vid. She hurries to find Kaylee and sends her to Simon. Then she settles in next to the comm she's hacked open on the bridge and listens. It's not long before Mal and Zoe join her.

* * *

 

"How's the learning going?" Simon hears Red ask Omar.

"Let me put it this way, he'll never eat again if he takes up politics."

Simon grits his teeth as he hears them both laugh, but he diligently returns his focus to the assessment of his last performance that Pierced Girl gave him. Low marks for believability, lower marks for forgetting details about the intelligence structure of Alliance government, and lowest for getting knocked out by the other players in the scenario. Plus his pronunciation of the safe words that Omar hacked out the "school's" databases is atrocious.

"Go get some rest. I'll talk to him," Red says. Silence follows, but eventually the sound of a plasticeel chair scraping on the concrete floor and footsteps indicate that Omar has followed orders.

Sleep. A full night's sleep would be nice. Better would be any sleep that occurred on a real bed in a warm apartment instead of cloth covered wooden pallets in a drafty, damp warehouse. A voice that sounds like his sister provides sarcastic commentary of his stay so far: "Worst. Vacation. Ever." Instead of laughing, he chokes back the sound as he hears Red approaching.

Simon lays the assessment on the makeshift wooden table in front of him and looks up as Red leans against the nearby wall. "Here to tell me that bad dress rehearsals mean successful operations?" Simon asks. That's all he's heard from Omar as he's messed up every simulation they've done for the past week.

Red shakes his head.

"What then? Practice makes perfect? Don't worry, if you fail, you won't survive long enough to feel guilty? What?"

Red waits out his ranting and shakes his head.

"So that's it? We give up?" Simon asks quietly.

Red stands and Simon flashes back to their first meeting when the tattooed giant towered over him. Then Simon had been equally terrified and hopeful. Now though, it's hard to find the energy to feel anything.

"No, Doc. I don't give up. Are you planning to?" Red asks.

Simon remembers the evidence that Red gave him that first night. The medical reports of the few _students_ to have been discharged from the _school_. His sister's fate if he messes up this one chance. "No."

"Then you better study the Intelligence Branch a little harder and work with Omar on your pronunciation. Two days, and we go."

Simon stands when Red starts to walk away. "Two days? That's never going to be enough time."

"We've been here as long as I planned to be. Two days, and you go. Whether it's back to your life, or off to see your sister, is your choice."

* * *

 

Two days later, reality goes exactly according to the script that Red wrote. Simon doesn't ask how they got hold of a perfect copy of a military intelligence uniform. The staff, with its hidden stun bomb, is finally ready and Omar has assures him that it shouldn't trigger prematurely. "Just make sure you don't bump it against any walls, eh?" is Omar's final piece of advice.

A stranger clad in the black uniform of the security service is his chauffeur. The stranger is completely silent as he closes the door and Simon suddenly has images of being driven directly to jail and being bound by the law. He swallows against the lump in his throat and mentally goes through the list of lines he'll have to recite to get into the underground facility. He firmly keeps from thinking about how easy it would be for their transport to leave with their payment and never show and how helpless he and River will be underground. Years of practice of never thinking about the bad outcomes of a surgery help to focus his mind on his task. First one action, and then another, until the operation is complete. The medical jargon calms him.

His thoughts are interrupted when the car stops and the door opens. Men in black suits stand in front of a small non-descript sandstone building. Simon's relieved to find that Omar's hack was successful and his credentials pass easily. The building's door opens with an audible hiss and a man in suit and tie covered by a static free lab coat greets him. "Sir, this is most unexpected."

"That would be why they are called surprise inspections," Simon answers coldly. The doctor nods and bows a proper greeting.

"Of course. Nurse Lycal will give you a full tour."

"No. I'm not interested in a tour, I can find the layout of the facility from building plans. I want to see one of the subjects. Preferably a successful one," Simon orders.

The man - Dr. Matthias, according to his name tag - pales at the implication of failure. "You're in luck. We already have a subject prepped for testing. If you'll follow me."

Simon works hard to keep his gaze firmly affixed to Matthias's back as they navigate the corridors. It's going to be hard enough to control his emotions when he sees River. He doesn't need to worry about witnessing other children in similar states.

Matthias finally stops and opens a door. Simon enters first and sees a room whose walls are filled with equipment. In the center is a chair and in the chair –

River.

He hears Matthias speaking, but Simon has eyes only for River as he paces around the room. She's wearing a blue leotard much like one she might wear to a dance recital. Blue absorbent paper hangs from her neck indicating that these _tests_ are not always easy on her stomach. He realizes the paper is there for other reasons when he sees a tech insert a needle into a device on River's forehead. Electrodes cover most of her face like a butterfly and it's obvious that she's distressed. Whimpers and tremors soon turn to convulsions and Simon freezes for fear of rushing to her aid and giving everything away. The tech is kneeling and out of range of the stun bomb right now.

"River is our star pupil," Matthias says. The use of River's name breaks Simon's trance.

"I've heard that."

Pride enters Matthias's voice, "She'll be ideal for defense deployment, even with the side effects."

Simon finally looks back at the doctor. "Tell me about them," he asks, projecting dispassionate interest with every fiber of his being.

"Well, obviously, she's unstable." Nervousness causes Matthias to hesitate as he walks toward one of the monitors on the wall. "The neural stripping does tend to fragment their own reality matrix. It manifests as borderline schizophrenia-"

Simon interrupts and talks over Matthias's explanation. "What use do we have for a psychic if she's insane?"

"She's not just a psychic," Matthias protests. "Given the right trigger, this girl is a living weapon." Simon walks closer to River as Matthias continues. "She has her lucid periods, and we're hoping to improve upon the - I'm sorry, sir, but I have to ask." Simon turns and regards the doctor, careful to hide his cold fury. "Is there a reason for this inspection?"

"Am I making you nervous?" Simon asks.

"Key members of Parliament have personally observed this subject. I was told that the Alliances support for the project was unanimous. The demonstration of her powers-"

Parliament. Was there no end to how far the inhumanity of this project went? Instead, Simon sticks to the script. "How is she physically?"

"Like nothing we've seen. All our subjects are conditioned for combat, but River, she's a creature of extraordinary grace." Simon can see the tech on the opposite side of River. Matthias's voice is behind him, to the side. Perfect placement of both to get maximum time from the shock wave.

"Yes, she always did love to dance," Simon says right before he kneels and slams his staff into the floor to activate the stun bomb.

Immediately, he's in front of River even as the bodies of the tech and the doctor are still dropping to the floor. "River, it's Simon." He carefully removes the needle as he struggles not to think about what he'll do if she doesn't come to. "Please, it's Simon," he tries again as he peels the electrodes from her face. "It's your brother." He caresses her face as he checks her pulse and she seems to calm somewhat.

Quickly, he goes to the door to check if the coast is clear. It looks like he'll have to carry her, he thinks as he removes his uniform jacket to reveal the scrubs of a nurse tech. He gasps when he sees River standing in front of him.

"Simon," River says. "They know you've come."

_ She knows who I am._ Exhaling the breath he didn't know he was holding, Simon throws his jacket to the side of the room and opens the door to the corridor. They have to get to the ventilation shaft. He escorts River out as if she's just another patient and he's just another conscience-less employee. "We can't make it to the surface from the inside," he explains as they go. Suddenly, he hears the sounds of people approaching. "Find a-" River scampers up the wall before he can even complete his thought. He tries not to ponder the implications.

He walks past the approaching doctors and down the hall toward their escape. It takes all his strength to not keep looking back for River. She's waiting at the shaft when he gets there. He finds the lever that Red's mole had stashed for him and immediately sets to work prying open the glass doors.

Wind howls and whips River's hair into Simon's face as they both climb onto the ledge. Below them, he can see red lights where the security lasers are being brought online. He unfolds the lever to reveal a suction cup and pincers that seal the glass shaft door closed. As soon as it's secure, two men in black suits with guns enter the maintenance room. One shoots at them while the other speaks into a communicator. Balancing on the ledge, Simon looks upward in search of any sign of their rescue. He winces and almost loses his balance when the suit bashes on the glass.

Finally, the sound of the wind is disrupted and he sees the sled descending toward them. River doesn't even wait for it to fully stop before getting on and grabbing a cord for dear life. Simon follows and spares one last glance for the security goons hammering away at the ventilation door. Then he looks up.

He did it. Whatever happened to River in that place, it will never happen again. And now that they're together, he can work towards fixing the damage that's been done.

* * *

 

The sound of Kaylee congratulating Simon and telling him how brave he was brings River back to _Serenity_. Looking behind her, she sees that she's once again alone on the bridge. No doubt the soldiers realized she'd rather be alone with her thoughts. River's grateful for the empty space in which to hear her own thoughts.

As she turns off the comms, she remembers the confusion she felt when the sled returned to the ship that transported them off of Osirus. She never saw the people in it, but she heard them. Felt them.

Simon held her for an eternity it seemed like before he told her what was going to happen. She didn't really listen to it. Just soaked Simon up like the sun that she'd not seen for so long. She remembers falling asleep. And then the cold. And the dreams. And the people talking and yelling at her and then

Simon.

She'd wondered how he'd found her. Now she knows.

River knows that she doesn't need to thank Simon for what he did for her. But there is one person that deserves their thanks. And she doubts that her brother ever took the risk required to thank him.

River turns on the Cortex and composes her message. She does it in the same code she used to send Simon her plea for help all those years ago, just for fun and also to prove that it's her.

> _ To: Omar Ojala@climate.os.net  
>  From: LGL@station5.r.net  
>  Subject: package  
> The package lifted off safe and in one piece, even if it's a little broken. Though he forgets to write himself, the Sake King sends his thanks. He takes so much looking after._

 

**The End**

**Author's Note:**

> Author notes: Okay, for once, I feel that I'm justified in writing some lengthier A/N. First off, this story was written for [](http://www.livejournal.com/users/les342/profile)[**les342**](http://www.livejournal.com/users/les342/) after she bought me for the [First Sweet Charity Auction](http://www.sweet-charity.net/), which benefited [the Rape, Abuse, and Incest National Network](http://www.rainn.org/). This was in part inspired by [info]poisontaster's much better done Gutterstars, but she never showed the actual rescue and Joss seemed to insist on jossing my idea of Simon as helpless by showing him in the facility rescuing River.  
> And so, Missing Chapters was finally finished with much more theatrics, flailing, and self flagellation than I normally take part in. i have to give huge props to [info]cassiee, [info]poisontaster, and [info]azuremonkey for hand holding, bunny throwing, wall bouncing, and beta duties. Without them, I assure you this would have been dren (though it might have been finished earlier -- I jest, I jest).


End file.
